today we worked on past participle. if you are like me, you might ask yourself, "what is the past participle?". well, in 'have you ever been to florida?' 'have' plus 'been' forms the past participle. i played an interview game with my students. they each had to go around the classroom asking their classmates if they have ever done one of 9 things. if the answer was yes, they were to get their classmate to sign their paper. the first 5 students to get 9 signatures were the winners.

these students sit in their desks all day. they are never really permitted to get out of their chairs so i thought this activity would be welcomed. some students remained in their seats the entire time. others converted the english i had written out for them on the worksheet into japanese and played the game using no english. i don't blame them really. they must be exhausted. yesterday (sunday) they had judo practice for 8 hours. today they will practice again but not until they finish 9 hours of school. oh, and they are constantly reminded to study really hard for their midterms tomorrow and the next day.

however, a few kids really got into it. they especially liked the "have you ever worn a sweater in the summer?" question. i cannot imagine wearing a sweater in the summer in japan. already it is sweltering. everyone has the sweat towels out already. i am wearing a light t-shirt and capri pants and i am soooo hot. it is unbelievable. jon and i brought out the fan last night. we kept it on all night. it never really cooled down. this must be unimaginable to everyone who lives where there was just a snowstorm. i'll trade you.

For a good look at where we live click this and scroll down through the page. Apparently the guy did a bike tour through Shikoku.

Yesterday I witnessed what was, without doubt, the worst drubbing in basketball history: Hayama, 146 - Yusuhara, 1. I couldn't believe it either. I walked into the gym at the start of the second half, when the score was 86-1. I asked why the score was so lopsided, and recieved an answer I couldn't understand. So I assumed it must have been a round robin score, where the points from the previous game carried over into the next. But I was watched the game, the truth began to unfold. Yusuhara didn't get the ball out of their zone the entire second half. Well, maybe twice they managed to bomb a hail mary out of bounds behind Hayama's net. Anyway, Hayama would hit a three, Yusuhara would throw the ball in bounds, Hayama would steal the ball and drain another three. This one kid - number 4, scored 17 points in a row. I bet Michael Jordan never did that. Sorry, this is getting to be more long winded than I intended, so I'll sign off by saying that the next time life gets you down, or when nothing seems to be going your way, think of the Yusuhara junior high school boys basketball team losing by 145 points to their Hayama counterparts, and smile.

Just some things I noticed:

If you are a student, you clean your own school. Branches cause leaves, which inevitably fall on the ground - solution: cut off the branches. You eat your food with chopsticks (yes, even soup). When eating out you change your shoes before going to the bathroom. The bananas are shrink-wrapped. A really good cantaloupe costs $2000. Construction workers wear lime green pajamas. Recycling is mandatory. You brush your teeth after lunch, in plain view of co-workers. If you are an elementary school student, you eat a healthy, hot and free school lunch. Your school playground was blistering white raked gravel. Otters are extinct. Ramen isn’t a snack, it’s a meal. You own a pair of purple sweatpants, unless you are the gym teacher, in which case you own three. “How was your weekend?” is a stupid question, because you worked Saturday and did housework on Sunday. A vacation is three days. It takes six days to see Europe, less if you skip England. Two hours is an easy commute. Shopping is an acceptable hobby. Your hobby is basketball, which you haven’t played since grade 9. Rice tastes great, breakfast, lunch and dinner. You eat your rice plain. You wait for the cross light, even if you are the only person for miles. You ride a granny bike. You pay a lot of money for services you never receive. Your wisdom tooth is called your tooth who doesn’t know its parents. You poop into a hole in the floor, and you hang your pants on the door when you do it (just in case). If you are female, you play the flushing water song so no one will hear you pee. Queen is real, good music. You slurp your noodles, soup and coffee. In junior high school, you practiced your club sport 365 days a year, four hours a day, except on weekends, when practice was eight hours. You own a really kick-ass digital camera. You videotape everything. You have GPS in your vehicle. Your GPS system doubles as satellite TV and a DVD player. You call a convenience store a kombini. You answer the phone “moshi, moshi.” Your cell phone is called a keitei, and it takes thirty minutes digital video. Your school uniform was designed by the Prussian empire and imported via Russia in the late 19th century. In junior high, there was no recess and noon hour lasted fifteen minutes. There is no heating in your home. You drink your coffee from a can. You can buy women’s underwear from the vending machine. For one dollar, you can buy a dozen fresh farm eggs from an unattended roadside stall. You eat your eggs raw. You eat your fish raw. After every meal, you say “That was a real feast.” Every four months you get a bonus, equal to two months wages. You work overtime without being asked, and without actually having any work to do. If you are a teacher, you work twelve hours a day, seven days a week. You spend 15% of your income on pachinko. You or someone you know works in the concrete industry: that person has likely paved a riverbed. You wash before getting into the tub. You bathe every chance you get. You are extremely polite and well behaved. You are kind to foreigners. You are xenophobic. You studied English for six years, but don’t speak it very well. You are deathly afraid of making mistakes. You judge a person by how he or she looks. You refer to co-workers by their job title. You don’t know how to use email, and you have never heard of Google. You like your pizza with corn and mayonnaise. You come from the country which invented sushi, sumo wrestling, flower arranging, noh drama, taiko drumming, haiku, the Walkman, the Diskman, cheap, well made automobiles and a million and one other things to be extremely proud of.

Just checking to see if comments have been enabled. If they have, please comment!

I almost forgot to mention the yubari melon (cantaloupe), which is currently going for around $2000 in fine department stores everywhere.

Minna san, ohisashiburi ne. Hi everyone, long time no see.

I think rainy season has set in. There's a typhoon on its way and it’s been raining off and on every day for two weeks. Better not forget that umbrella.

Last weekend we went white water rafting up in the mountains. The day was organized by a fellow JET who we had never really talked to, but who turned out to be a nice guy. The owner of the company we went with was an Australian who has been here for seven years. He’s married to a Japanese woman, and although their daughter understands English, she only speaks Tosa-ben, the local dialect.

The rafting trip was 14 kilometers through almost pristine nature. The scenery was spectacular: sheer rock face shooting up from the river into the mist shrouded mountains looming overhead.

Nancy went for the longest swim of the day, maybe a kilometer through the biggest set of rapids on the river. What happened is we hit the first really big rapid, which sent this dude flying across the boat. Pandemonium ensued, with the end result being Nancy gasping for air in the frigid water. Her fear was genuine, but in the end she was bragging about the ride of her life ;-)

Other than that, not much. Pretty busy at work, but that’ll peter off in another month or so. Then it’s on to the plane again, this time headed for home sweet home. Hopefully someone (Kevin ;-)) will tape the Flames for me. I can’t believe it. A Canadian team – never mind that it’s the Calgary Flames! – in the Stanley Cup and here I am, watching sumo and sipping green tea. Oh, the injustice! Later.

A Japanese collegue of mine called me the other day to fill me in on some information that he felt enlightened with having gone on a very short vacation to South Africa. I could not believe the things that were coming out of his mouth. These are direct quotes.

1. "South Africa is a black people's nation."

2. "There are two kinds of people in South Africa - the rich and the poor."

3. "It is mostly the rich people who are white and the black people who are poor."

Can you believe this? Is Japan really this sheltered?

Okay. I am back. I haven't had a chance to write on the blog for a while but I decided I better step up. Jon and Nancy's Amazing Japanese Adventure is turning into Jon's Amazing Japanese Adventure with an occasional hello from Nancy. I am going to fix that and really really try to write more often.

Today was a day like any other. I was told to teach something ridiculous to a room full of teenagers. This time it happened to be facial expressions. Now, you might be thinking, "what's the big deal?". First you must ask yourself, "Have I ever tried to teach a room full of Japanese teenagers to lift their eyebrows a little when they are saying 'really'?" The key here is JAPANESE who, by definition, do not have any facial expressions whatsoever. It is a sign of weakness, according to Japanese culture, if you display your emotions freely. Their faces look the exact same when they are excastic and when they are fuming mad. Zenen wakaranai. I can't tell.

"Oh. Hello Yumi! How are you?"

"I'm fine thank you, and you?"

"So when you make that face and say fine, do you mean you are happy or do you mean you are ready to beat me up?"

And, how do you teach someone facial expressions? I can't tell what my face is doing when I say things. It just does something. Plus, why am I teaching this to these students when they are still working on not saying "how are you" back to me when I ask "How are you?".

"How are you?"

"How are you?"

"No...no. I say 'how are you' and you say 'I am fine thank you, and you*?'"

*before it drove me nuts how everyone said 'I am fine thank you, and you' but now I am just thankful that they don't repeat 'how are you?'

So, anyways, I tried my best and I let my face do the talking. My students also tried their best. Actually, I have no clue if they were trying or not because when they were copying me their faces didn't move a millimeter. Their expressions were the same as always. Eyebrows in neutral. Eyes avoiding eye contact with anyone or anything at all costs. I should have brought in a wild monkey. Monkeys hate to be stared at; they find it threatening. Japanese people love to stare down wild animals, epecially monkeys. It seems that the Japanese believe animals were put on this earth for one of three reasons.

1. To be eaten by humans.

2. To become house pets.

3. To live in a petting zoo where people can pet them or, better yet, carry food around in little bags to feed the animals who are running free.

Jon was chased by llamas and some buffalo in a petting zoo near Aso. Oh, no I am sorry. The buffulo were in cages but there were free-roaming deer. Ask him about it. We also saw a little girl almost get run down by these llamas and deer while her parents watched and laughed histerically. It was frightening. She was terrified. Apparently her parents thought it was funny that she came really close to being trampled. Afterall, who wouldn't find that funny, right?

ah.....the Japanese sense of humor......

Let's bow our heads in praise of Japanese whale science.

In Japan every region has its own special food. Like you know how in Saskabush if you go around Yorkton you're going to get perogies every day but if you head to North Battleford sometimes you get mashed potatoes instead of perogies? Or how if you're in the far north you might get moose sausage at the Farmer's Day festival, but if you go down south you're more likely to get deer sausage? It's like that, but different.

For example, around Kochi the speciality is bonito. A dark fleshed fish, bonito is most often eaten raw, as sushi or sashimi. But the real sweet stuff that everyone's grandma serves at New Year's or Ichi-ni-san Day is bonito tataki, which is seared bonito seasoned with vinegar and eaten with garlic, soy sauce and some greenery, usually shredded cabbage or lettuce. It's delicious.

Susaki, meanwhile, is famous for nabayaki ramen, which is bland and often overcooked, but comes in a clay pot. This, apparently, is akin to an albino gorilla, which is to say unique, so much so that the city is trying to build a tourist industry around the idea. Think Berry Barn meets Chinese noodles.

And Sakawa? The speciality there is sake, which it brews in immense quantities (best served warm, by the way).

So anyway, in Kyushu they have their own special food.

In Aso-san they really enjoy their uma sashimi, or raw horse meat. Those beautiful horses out to pasture in the shadow of the belching, sputtering volcano? Don't worry, they're being put to good use. When I got back to the office everyone wanted to know if I had tried a few slices of Mr. Ed. Of course I hadn't. I have to admit, the idea grossed me out a little. I don't know if I could have eaten it, even if I'd wanted to.

In Unzen, they like their onsen tamago, or backward boiled eggs. To cook, they throw normal eggs into the hot spring water, which isn't quite boiling. After a couple hours the yolk is cooked but the white is raw. I couldn't eat that one either.

In Nagasaki, the speciality was champon, which is a Chinese soup and noodle deal, very similar to ramen, but more delicious. It had octopus, fish, shrimp, beef, pork, baby peas, bok choy, sprouts and wheat noodles in a milky fish broth. I ate a bowl in downtown Nagasaki, while waiting for the rain to let up, during which a Buddhist priest walked by banging a taiko drum.

And finally, in Haki to Taki or whatever it was called, they really seem to dig whale meat. This is the one that gets me a little hot under the collar. It's illegal to hunt whales for commercial purposes, but luckily for Japanese whale lovers everywhere, the Japanese hunt is for strictly scientific purposes. (Everyone here thinks they want to scientifically calculate the absolute most Japanese people will pay to eat whale meat.) At the sushi place where we ate, there was a huge pink hunk of flesh, which was probably about 1/1,000,000th of a whale, and which was probably worth as much as a new flat screen digital TV. Needless to say, I didn't eat that one either.

We're back from camping in Kyushu. The middle of the island where we spent most of our time reminded me a lot of home. Big skies and open landscapes, rolling cattle pasture and small farming towns. Just like Saskabush, but for one thing: a gigantic, smouldering volcano smack in the middle of the all.

Aso-san was a totally unique landscape. It made me feel like I was Neil Armstrong, "One small step for man..." Only it wasn't just one small step I had to take, but rather a million or so normal sized steps, which carried Nancy and I up the back end of Aso-san, around the side, along the ridge of another couple mountains, up the front of yet another, and finally back down. The whole mountain was pretty much devoid of anything green, and the sulphur that blew into my face almost strangled me. It was a pretty great hike, and we took a whole roll of film up there. Hopefully the pictures turn out.

After Aso-san we drove to another volcano, Fugen-dake, in Unzen. This one was a lot more normal landscape, although the volcano had most recently erupted around '98, with the lava flow reaching the suburbs of the city nearby. The hike was thorugh a beautiful and real forest, as opposed to the cedar plantations that make up most of Japan's countryside. It was a relaxing day.

The next stop was Nagasaki, which was crazy, smelly, loud, overpopulated and just about the same as every other Japanese city, with mutilated trees and wires running every which way overhead. We went to the A-bomb museum, which was good, but not like the one in Hiroshima. We also went to an island which was the only place that foreigners were allowed to live during Japan's 200 years of isolation. Most of the people who lived there were Dutch, and were trading with their colonies in Indonesia and the Japanese and back to Europe. It was pretty interesting.

Finally we were going to go see a big gorge and do another hike, but we got rained out. Our crappy tire tent wasn't one bit waterproof and the poles were made from a material with a strength about that of wet noodles, so we bailed out and had a laundry day today. It was a great vacation, and hopefully I get the urge to write in more detail about it. But for now I'm going to enjoying the movie. See you again.